The Trips My Mind Takes

Writing this I’ve never done before  You bring out a side I’ve never shown before  You display your emotions so boldly  Makes me want bring out the old me  The cold me who hides how she feels The me that will push you away to feel safe  The me that will make it seem like you mean nothing  Which would be a lie because you mean something  Never in my life have I felt confused on how I feel  You have this appeal that makes me wonder  But you display actions that makes stutter  Not stutter my words but my feelings for you  The smile on my face  The love in your eyes The flutters in my stomach  The aggression in your voice  The touch of our skin  I think I’m stuck  But I never want it to end 

Fear A four letter word that seems so small but holds so much weight  Fear  A word that only has one syllable but can easily strip everything from you Fear That’s what strikes my heart, my mind, my soul This word stops me from letting go From escaping into a new world  Experiencing new beginnings, love and happiness  From allowing you to discover all of me  Fear is my F word  I tried to run from it  Hide under my blanket Burn it in the shower Devour it with my meals  But it keeps coming up   It takes the smallest doubt in my mind and turns it into a worry It takes the happiness I have and throws it into a sense of depression  It stops me from trusting  Constantly questioning what if What if this isn’t what you want What if I’m keeping you from happiness  What if you are feeling sorry for me What if your playing me  What if everything was a lie  Fear is my tragedy...